Struggle with Professional Challenges New York City

Learning at Lourdes- Through The Open Door

Showing HumilityBy George Marino CPC, CMMT

“If you have something to say to me, would you be kind enough to write it down” asked Bernadette Soubirous to the Lady of Lourdes on February 18, 1858. The Lady smiled and answered that it would not be necessary to do so. Then, addressing Bernadette directly with utmost dignity and respect, the beautiful Lady asked: “Would you have the grace to return here for fifteen days?” Bernadette accepted. She also told her: “I do not promise to make you happy in this world, but in the other.”

In my visits to Lourdes and Nevers, France where Bernadette later lived in simplicity, I am struck by the personal relationship occurring in this face- to- face meeting. Rather than writing down what she has to say, the Lady of Lourdes wants a direct communication and transmission of spirit where the full breadth and depth of an exchange between two can take place. Bernadette showing humility accepted and the doors opened for her in more ways than one!

In my personal and professional life, from an early age, I learned that these personal face-to-face meetings, especially at key moments in a relationship can shift perspective for both people in the conversation. Direct communication face- to face between two people allows for the possibility to express oneself with their whole body, mind, soul and spirit in a mutual shared space.

The Lady’s promise to be happy in the “other” points to a different state of Being that is available Now to us, as it is for Bernadette. The key signpost to this state of Being in this exchange is her acceptance (Non Resistance) to meet face- to face with the Lady. To “write down” and let that be the basis of the communication what one has to say at key moments would not work then, as it too often does not work today in many situations. Humility is effortless when we are fully present in the Now, as the Lady and Bernadette teach us.

Do you have a relationship situation in your life that may warrant a face to face meeting to help reach closure or to discuss some misunderstanding?

Rather than sending a text or writing an e-mail requiring effort, planning and much thinking and recalling, I suggest that you meet face to face in a different setting without expectations about the outcome. If you feel uncomfortable, or would like to work on these skills, I offer guidance and coaching sessions to help people meet these challenges in their personal or professional life.

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